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I know that I hardly ever post, so I will discuss my year with one survey, yea!!!! [Dec. 19th, 2005|07:42 pm]
1. What did you do in 2005 that you'd never done before?
A few choice drugs and moved out of my moms

2. Did you keep your new years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
I usually do not make one

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
My friend Lyndsey did, but we were mad at each other at the time, so I wasn't there.

4. Did anyone close to you die?
All 3 of my dogs.

5. What countries did you visit?

6. What would you like to have in 2006 that you lacked in 2005?
More time to myself.

7. What dates from 2005 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
January 17, for reasons that will remain untold, May 11, because I turned 21, September 3, because I moved into my apartment.

8.What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Going back to school

9.What was your biggest failure?
Staying at CVS this long.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
Well, my wisdom teeth became infected twice

11. What was the best thing you bought?
My vacation to Florida.

12. Whose behaviour merited celebration?
I feel that everyone that I know always merits celebration, that sounds like a good cop out to me!

13. Whose behaviour made you appalled?
I am not going to say their name, but they know who they are...

14. Where did most of your money go?
Rent, gas, groceries, car payment and insurance, other bills, and a whole lot of alcohol

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Going to florida, moving out on my own, turning 21, and a bunch of other shit probably

16. What songs will always remind you of 2005?
holla back girl(unfortunately) is probably the song that was stuck in my freakin head for most of the year

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
- i. happier or sadder? depends on what day
- ii. richer or poorer? definately poorer

18. What do you wish you'd done more of?
made time for friends and at healthier

19. What do you wish you'd done less of?
I wish that I worked less and did less drugs(kinda)

20. How will you be spending Christmas?
I will visit my mom down south and then I will work

21. Who did you spend the most time on the phone with?

22. What LJ users did you meet for the first time?

23. How many one-night stands?

24. What was your favourite TV program?
Sex in the City

25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
yes, but he doesn't live here anymore

26. What was the best book you read?
I didn't read anything, that's kind of pathetic

27. What was your greatest musical discovery?
Jack Johnson

28. What did you want and get?
high alot

29. What did you want and not get?
high alot

30. What was your favourite film of this year?
garden state

31. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I turned 21 and went to the Vogue, enough said

32. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
A better job, with the same co-workers

33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2005?
Bar slut gone wild

34. What kept you sane?
pot and zoloft

34 b. What kept you from losing even more marbles?
more pot

35. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Natalie Portman

36. What political issue stirred you the most?
The BIRD FLU!!!!

37. Who did you miss?
Cheryl and Justin, because I didn't see them much during the end

38. Who was the best new person you met?
Sarah Ahaus

39. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2005:
If you spill bong water on yourself, you will smell like it for days.

40. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year:
Everyone is a Fucking Napoleon!!!!
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My Last Night.... [Sep. 4th, 2005|12:29 am]
[mood |exhaustedexhausted]
[music |Ani]

I think that by writing this, I might seem like I've lost my mind. I mean, every person my in my age range dreams of the moment that they finally get to spread their wings and move out on their own. But, at this moment, while I am packing away my things and digging through all of my memories in order to decide which ones are important enough to keep, I find myself with this bittersweet taste in my mouth. It just seems so strange to me that for most of my life I have longed for this time, yet now that I am at this crossroad, I find myself so terrified. So many things could go wrong, and I don't trust myself with this kind of decision.

I am going to miss my childhood room. As I pack all of my belongings, I realize this even more. I notice things in my room that I haven't noticed in years. Things that were so important to me. I never realized how many memories you could release by opening one simple box that you packed up so many years before. Just staring at the walls in my room makes me realize how much I have grown within the time that I have lived here.

Moving out is going to be awesome, I have no doubt in my mind about that, but losing my childhood home is what utterly breaks my heart.

But Xanax always has a way smoothing these things out.
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My poor little head... [Aug. 19th, 2005|09:06 pm]
[mood |lethargiclethargic]
[music |Coldplay]

Today is just one of those days that have been completely uneventful. Just laid around and watched movies, waiting for my baby to get off of work so we can cuddle. But, I guess that there isn't much better to do when your drugged.

I got to spend a lovely hour of my evening after a 10 hour day at work in the Emergency Room. Apperently, one of my wisdom teeth has managed to get infected. So now it basically looks like I am trying to chew on a flippin golf ball. So the emergency room doctor wrote me 2 prescriptions, one for a incredibly high dose of penicillin, and the other for my good friend hydrocodone. He also told me that I am going to have to have them removed so they do not get infected again. Which would be a wonderful idea, that is, of course, if I had any medical insurance, or 13 hundred dollars for that matter. But the night wasn't a total bust, because when I got home, my sweetheart had bought me some soup and a dozen roses to make me feel better.

Christal and I start school on Monday. I am a tad bit excited because I know that the sooner I start this whole going back to school thing, the sooner I can get this two years finished and be done with this bull shit. Anywho, Christal and I will both have to be at the Ivy Tech campus if bum fuck Columbus, Indiana at 8 o'clock in the morning. Hell, if I could I would just drive another 20 minutes after class and visit my Jim if I didn't have another class in the evening at the Lawrence Campus. But I most definately would if I could. By the way, shout out to my little Jimbalina. Love Ya!!

This weekend I really need to sit down and go through shit that I will throw away on the big move that I am really hoping for. I am getting super duper pscyhed about that. It is going to be hella-awesome. The suspense is killing me.

Other than that, not much more is going on in my life. Not doing to good, but not doing to bad either.
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The worst experience ever! [Sep. 19th, 2004|03:56 pm]
Remind me to never watch Cold Mountain when I am premenstrual. It is a bad combination.
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Coconuts and Limes smell Pretty... [Sep. 13th, 2004|12:39 am]
[mood |apatheticapathetic]
[music |Fiona Apple- Never is a Promise]

Went to the mall today. It was lovely. Blah Blah. Dan cut all of his hair off, then he got depressed. I bought a cool Amelie poster. I liked the movie and all, but I mainly bought the poster because it had a full moon on it and that made me happy. I saw K-Lynn at the mall also. I saw her cool belt buckle. Sorry I couldn't make it to your party, I had to help my mom around the house. We should be moving here soon. I'm not sure where quite yet, but I'm sure it will be somewhere. I have less than 2 weeks at my job. Yea!!!!! I hate my job. Boooo!!!!! I have biology tommorow. Maybe he will fill my head with other scary statistics.

*To Do List*
-declare a major
-add some finishing touches to my skanky halloween costume
-lay off the vicodin
-go to a pumpkin patch
-get my oil changed
-try to fight the urges to bang my head against a wall every time I think about the future

Maybe one day I will find hope again when I look up at the stars...
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Ok Jim, I will update just for you!!!! [Sep. 10th, 2004|01:31 pm]
[mood |confusedconfused]
[music |coldplay]

I woke up today with a little bit more hope for my future. I think that took a little bit of stress off of my chest. At least that is over and done with and I don't have to worry about that. Now I just have to wait for this two weeks to slowly crawl by like I know that it will. It will be so great to not have to drive all the way up to Carmel anymore. So now I am going to take a month off from working. I am just going to go to school and see if I can find out what I want in my life. I just can't seem to pick what I want to do with my life. So if anyone can think of a career that would seem to fit me, then please comment and let me know, because I sure don't know what I should do.

I am just happy that it is about to be autumn and I get to watch the leaves fall soon. Dan brought me a pumpkin the other day and it made me happy. I like pumpkins.

I miss my Jim. I miss him like I miss a part of myself. I need to talk to him so I think that I will call him after I am done with writing this. He will help me with my issues. Because he loves me and I love him and we are to fabulous people who will probably spend the rest of our fabulous lives together because we will scare away every significant other that we will ever have. Because we are so unusually fabolous.

Ok, I'm done!!!!!!!!!!
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Its all about the lighting... [Jul. 27th, 2004|01:43 pm]
[mood |groggygroggy]

Strange to see people in a different light. To see life in a different light. I have this tendency to forget that I have control over my own life. Guess that's what happens when you let someone live life for you. Hard to see a different future when your just a puppet controlled by someone else. You used to flick my strings just enough to shake me up, but you were dumb enough to think that those strings would never break. But you were always the naive kind, even though that was what you portrayed me as. But I was more of the determined kind. I might have tried even when things were bleak, but I still knew just how bad things were. I knew that I was playing with fire. But the burn is coming as a total shock for you now. And now to look back on it, it is funny how you thought that you were in control. Where are your strings now when you need them the most. When those strings broke, I might have hit the ground the hardest, but the reality check hit you far worse in the end.
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I am exhausted!!! [Apr. 30th, 2004|12:14 pm]
I got entirely to fucked up last night. My finals are almost done, thank god. Sorry if you didn't enjoy your bonfire last night Justin. Cheryl's fruit dip kicks ass. I am totally not digging this whole dating thing.

I heart everyone!
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(no subject) [Apr. 30th, 2004|12:13 pm]
1.Go into your LJ's archives.
2.Find your 23rd post (or closest to).
3.Find the fifth sentence (or closest to).
4.Post the text of the sentence in your blog along with these instructions.

I haven't talked to Jim lately so I need to do that.
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Ah Geeze!!!! [Feb. 21st, 2004|08:06 pm]
I am pretty sure that right now my boyfriend is getting his face rubbed in some strippers boobs.


Happy 21st birthday, sweety!!!!!
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